Balancing Acts

A working single mom attending law school

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Posts Tagged ‘non-traditional student’

The end is near

Posted by newlawmom on October 28, 2010

Tomorrow I register for my last semester of law school. The best news of all is that I only need eleven credits to graduate and seven of those are going to consist of an externship and moot court credits that I have already earned. That means I only need to take 4 credits worth of classes. It is really hard to believe, but I am glad to see the end in sight. This semester has been really bad for me. I just want to get through it at this point. I am taking six classes, with a total of four exams and two papers. One substantial paper is half done and one has not been started yet. There are only five more weeks of classes, so it is time to prepare. Everyone at my house is basically avoiding me right now because I have been more than a little bit crabby. I can’t help it. I just want to be left alone. It is really sad that after getting this far I feel so overwhelmed by the entire project. I know it will be worth it when its over, and I know when I look back on it I will be happy with achieving it at all, but I had higher expectations for myself all the way around. When law school meets single mom with three kids, a man friend, a job, and a mother who so tragically gets sick and dies between April and September, it is not a pretty sight. I do not recommend it to anyone. Law school does not bend, even though everyone at school has been extremely kind. Right now, I need to put blinders on and ignore the world. That means that anyone who disturbs me is asking for trouble. The level of stress in my life is off the charts, and all my enjoyment of law school is gone. I want nothing more than to be done. So wish me luck with that. I’ll take support from my anonymous non-trad cyber students because there is nobody in my real world who actually gets it.

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Posted in 3L, law school | Tagged: , , , , | 1 Comment »

Disaster Strikes

Posted by newlawmom on October 4, 2010

So if I thought for a single minute that the last year of law school would be smooth sailing, I was wrong. I had actually thought about taking the semester off to deal with my mother’s illness, but I decided against it. We lost her companion of many years on 8/15, and my mom passed two weeks ago today. I suppose this is what non-traditional is all about, right? The problem is I am not functioning well. I have been just barely squeezing by since the beginning of the semester and it is starting to catch up with me. I will pull it off in the end, but for today I just feel like bitching. Whining, complaining and being generally difficult. I am behind on my work. Unprepared for class. Incompetent to represent any client and wondering why I ever thought I wanted to do this in the first place. I don’t care about the law as it relates to real property, land use, family, or criminal either. All I really care about right now is my bed and the fact I don’t see nearly enough of it. My children, whom I love dearly, are driving me insane and need far more than I am able to give them. The truth is I want to get in my car and drive far, far away. Sometimes I want to drive far, far away with my law books so I can catch up on my work, and other times I think I should just take a few days completely to myself. Sadly, I do not have time to drive away because every possible thing seems to demand my attention right now, as I have ignored everything since my mother got sick last April. In the end, I want to whine. OK? I’m done now. I’m going to bed so I can start this all over again tomorrow. And no, I haven’t done my reading for those classes yet either. But I’ll be sure to write again after I get caught up.

Posted in 3L, law school, Law School Life, loss, Parenthood | Tagged: , , , | 1 Comment »